This week’s prompt for The Red Dress Club was: tell us about a time in your life when you endured something painful, but later realized it was a blessing.
Back
I fell in love with your smile
But I’m living with your back:
A back that has turned on me
Like the backs of men before you,
Stiff with anger and the rush
To run through an open door.
It’s the only part of a man
I truly understand.
Did it begin with my father,
Who gave me the back of his mind,
The only nook left over
After the sports page and
A hard day’s work,
Who sent me back to my room
His only defense against a mouth
Grown too large for the girl?
I reveled in your iron back,
Mapped it out, staked my claim
Like some ardent Napoleon,
With fingers, palms, nails, teeth–
Sometimes cutting in hard and deep
Hoping your taste would linger
A little longer in my mouth.
I face your back as you bend
Over boxes of old sweatshirts,
Soccer trophies and books of Aristotle–
Admire the wandering tributaries
Of muscle and sinew
The curve and flex
Of the only part of you
Ever given generously.
Today I am throwing you back
To seek fresher waters.
I will miss you
But I will not miss your back–
The back puffed in victory
The back scrambling out the door
The back of your hand.
{ 55 comments… read them below or add one }
Wow, this is powerful and emotional.
ayala recently posted..Doubt
Loved this. Amazing. Truly. Especially the last two graphs. And the line about a girl whose mouth had grown too big.
xo
This leaves me absolutely speechless.
My heart is racing a little. Just wow.
Christine @ Coffees & Commutes recently posted..The Gift of Memories
Wow. Just…really, really wow. Very awesome job.
Miranda recently posted..I am 18 going on…married
Beautiful, concise, clean, sharp. Great job.
Came from TRDC.
Kim recently posted..A Different Way of Getting Around
Seriously, WOW! This is such a powerful piece. Well done!
Ashley recently posted..From Boeuf to Baby – Part One
You’ve got this amazing power over words. Keep usin’ it.
Words are powerful things in the hands of someone who knows how to use them. They are freedom. You bring freedom with these words.
Touching.
B
bryan recently posted..Ham and Gravy
Great poem, Kitch. You use equivocation on”back” to great effect. It both pleases my brain and moves my heart.
GEW recently posted..Novel Suggestions- Please
This is so wonderfully sad and liberating. Great job.
Amy recently posted..Grace
I agree with Amy. Nicely done.
You are just simply awesome. I love it.
Jennifer recently posted..Unanswered prayer
*LOVE*
wandering tributaries / Of muscle and sinew
I lingered there longest in word-love; lines like these take my breath and swell my heart. Pain and blessing in the flesh, indeed, Kitch.
Contemporary Troubadour recently posted..Printed and mailed!
Poetry always impresses me since it always alludes me unless I can rhyme it badly.
“The back of his mind.” what a great visual for low level listening. Throwing you back to seek fresher waters–lots of liberation in those words!
Thanks for sharing!
♥
Katybeth recently posted..Hug an Aussie and Eat a Pretzel Day
Katybeth,
You aren’t low-level anything.
Holy cow, “the back of his mind.” Such a simple statement that speaks volumes.
Ash recently posted..A different perspective
Absolutely elegant.
That is all.
Lori @ In Pursuit of Martha Points recently posted..I’d Be a Wicked Good Nature Show Host
Gorgeous and powerful. Wow.
BigLittleWolf recently posted..Triggers
I agree with everyone. The visuals you created are powerful. Great job.
Loved this, Kitch. And not missing the back of a hand could be a slogan for stopping domestic violence.
Belinda,
How can young girls be so stupid? A slogan, indeed.
Wow. That’s frightening.
Normally I have a hard time with poetry, and rarely comment on it, but this was so smooth, so easy to read, and even though I didn’t know exactly what was happening I felt like I did, I felt as if I could actually feel you.
Jennifer recently posted..Writer’s Block
Wow. Your talent knows no bounds.
Justine recently posted..Our eggs-cellent adventure
Incredibly strong. I can see your own back; standing tall, determined, and walking with courage into the direction of your dreams. Good for you! More women could use a back as strong as yours.
le chef recently posted..Chosen Legacy
Dana- lovely poem. The end is particularly powerful as litany.
anneliesz,
Hi! Are you married yet? I miss you!
OK.
I think I now have come to understand you.
You don’t realize what a gifted writer you are.
That’s the only reason for how you let us come here for free.
Because I’d pay for you.
No lie.
Alexandra,
What is this pay you speak of? But thank you. :)
Beautifully written, exquisitely worded imagery…A resounding piece, Kitch!
Maria recently posted..Counting my blessings
WOW! Absolutely incredible! I think this is your best piece ever! You are truly gifted.
Just recently discover your blog. All the ladies here described your poem perfect, powerful, strong, exquisite, and full of emotions. I’m in awe. Thanks for sharing.
MissChi recently posted..Dance Baby Dance Dance
This is so powerful. I love it. The rhythm is perfect. And it’s so honest.
Thank you for sharing something so personal.
Wow… So raw, so amazing – very well written. You are a talented being and I adore you for that.
Heather recently posted..It’s All In The Name
Wow. Simply wow. Beautifully written. And so powerful.
You are awesome.
Let’s do lunch soon! Hugs!
manisha recently posted..Sunday Snapshot- Inside a Crumbling Temple
This made my entire day, knowing that such incredible writing is out there. Oh, man this is good.
It’s the only part of a man
I truly understand.
Isn’t that the truth? How it’s so easy to put on that armor?
Also, that ardent Napoleon line made me so happy.
Thank you for writing such elegant words.
Brilliant.
The end.
saw Nancy’s tweet about this and had to come over. SO glad I did. this is utterly amazing. i don’t really have any words. left me with a lot to think about. reminds me in a lot of ways of my father….tremendous job.
Erin Margolin recently posted..Earth Day Giveaway
that was simply beautiful, a rare and honest look into what you endured and what you would not suffer through anymore. WOW.
Kir recently posted..Mama Kats Writing Workshop- Tell Me Something Good
beautiful!
JennyMac recently posted..Apparently this is still a hot topic- penis size
honest. powerful.
love it…
This is some of your best writing. You must be really feeling it. Awesome.
Velva
This is some great poetry, TKW! I am impressed! Believe me, I read a lot of poetry (ahem, editor at Poetica), and this is lovely. Also, did we date the same a-holes or what? :)
I’m out of breath. This was perfect. How you told this story stays with you. Blew me away.
Beautiful. Amazing. Great work.
I will never think about backs the same way again.
I would pay for your writing also.
Oh my! This poem hit me in such a visceral way. So very, very powerful. You are an amazing poet. Simply amazing.
Whoa. What just happened? That was really powerful.
I’m stuck on the “back of his mind” part…can totally relate.
Liz @ PeaceLoveGuac recently posted..Sunday Grace
Holy crap, Kitch. Not just powerful, but beautifully written. You are so amazingly versatile in your writing talent.
P.S. The style reminded me a lot of Jewel, the singer/songwriter/poet…my fave.
Brilliant. Your words captivate me. So well written.
Kimberly recently posted..Secret Mommy-hood Confession Saturday
Welcome back
Privilege of Parenting recently posted..Left Behind