Recently, I was home alone at dinnertime. Hubs and the girls were in Texas, attending my SIL’s baby shower, and Awesome Stepkid R. was at the movies with friends. I can’t even tell you how completely freaking weird it felt. Me. Empty house. Dinner time. Bizarro.
I realized that I could make and eat whatever the heck I wanted to eat. No finicky palates to consider, no sneaking of the vegetables, no pleas for bland food. Hot damn.
Because I am a lazy slob, I actually considered making myself one of my trademark single-girl meals, which are so shameful and weird that I only scarf them on the sly.
TKW’s Trademark Single-Girl Meals:
-a bowl of steaming basmati rice, swirled with chopped tomato and slivers of red onion, topped with shards of very strong bleu cheese, salted and peppered. Sometimes with a drizzle of balsamic.
-bacon, lettuce, tomato and avocado (the microwave thick-cut bacon, so don’t go getting all impressed that I made fresh bacon) on a toasted english muffin
-any leftover about to go bad in the next day
-pimiento-jalapeno cheese from Whole Foods on a toasted english muffin, topped with a tomato
-ultimate comfort food: a big bowl of Uncle Ben’s converted rice, buttered and salted to death
Seriously. Those are the meals that, if left to my own devices, I greedily consume. But I was out of jalapeno-pimiento cheese (alors!) and the English muffins had died a hard and ugly death in the bread box. For once, I didn’t have any leftover rice in the refrigerator.
I was tempted to pout, but then I spied a deli container loafing in the corner of of the meat drawer. A deli container that held two of my essential food groups: salt and brine.
Olives.
Plump, imported, luscious olives.
Full disclosure: When I saw the olives, I considered just eating them out of the container accompanied by a big hunk of Fontina and a fistful of Triscuits. Sorely tempted.
But I can’t always be a lazy slob, so I chopped some tomatoes and herbs, tossed in chiles and olives, plopped in some freshly drained pasta and then went to town on it with the cheese. Viola! Pasta Puttanesca.
It was just what I wanted. Fresh, sharp, spicy and cheesy.
I will confess to one oddity: After I scooped up my portion, I immediately parceled the rest into Tupperware containers and placed them in the refrigerator.
I know myself too well. I cannot be trusted around pasta. When faced with a giant bowl of pasta, I become an insatiable slut. A noodle trollop. It’s a sickness.
I took my reasonably-portioned feast to the couch, hung out with my friend TiVo, and had a delicious time. And no, I did not sneak back to the refrigerator and twist some barely warm Puttanesca into my mouth, hunkered over the sink. Such behavior is downright shameless.
There are several theories I’ve heard about the naming of this dish, Pasta Puttanesca (whore’s pasta). One theory is that the sauce for this spicy pasta is so pungent that Italian ladies of the night used to leave it bubbling on the stove, hoping to entice men in from the streets.
Another story I’ve heard is that this pasta is so quick to prepare that putas could eat it on the fly, between customers.
And yet another idea swirling in the mix is that the ingredients for this dish are so humble and inexpensive, even the poorest of working girls could afford to eat well.
In my opinion, all of these stories have merit.
Fish Phobes: do not fear the anchovies in this sauce–you honestly won’t taste them in the finished product. Anchovies, when toasted in olive oil, get melty and nutty and delicious. There won’t be a fishy flavor to your sauce–you’ll just taste something salty and fantastic in the background…kind of like Parmesan on steriods.
This is a rustic, warming meal that will soothe the grumpiest–and laziest–of bellies. If you fear the spice, add just a pinch of red pepper flakes to the sauce; I like zingy, so I added double the amount called for in the recipe. I’m racy that way.
Pasta Puttanesca
serves 4-6 (ah, who am I kidding? 4)
2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
4 small anchovy fillets, minced or 1 teaspoon anchovy paste
1/4 teaspoon red chile flakes
3 garlic cloves, minced
1/2 cup dry white wine
1 (28-ounce) can whole tomatoes, preferably San Marzano
salt and pepper
1/2 to 1 cup meaty green and black olives, pitted and halved
1 tablespoon capers, drained
1/2 cup fresh Italian flat-leaf parsley or fresh basil, chopped
1 pound linguine or spaghetti, cooked
In a large saucepan over medium heat, warm the anchovies and olive oil, stirring to break up the anchovies. Cook the anchovies until toasted and completely broken down, about 5 minutes. Add the garlic and the chile flakes and cook 1 minute. Add the wine and stir, scraping the pan with a wooden spoon to loosen up any brown bits. Add the tomatoes and liquid, crushing by hand or using the back of a spoon to break up the tomatoes. Bring to a boil and then reduce the heat to a simmer. Cook for about 15 minutes or until thickened and saucy. Stir in the olives and capers; heat through. Season to taste with salt and pepper.
Toss cooked, drained pasta into the sauce in the saucepan, turning to coat all of the pasta. If mixture seems dry, add some of the pasta cooking water to the sauce by ladlefuls. Toss parsley in and, if desired, top with grated Parmesan cheese and a few extra sprinkles of chile flakes.
{ 55 comments… read them below or add one }
Home alone–oh how I love thee. When Joe quit his job and decided to become a movie star–he was home during the day with me and I almost lost my mind. I married him for better or worse but not for lunch! Every women needs her house to herself once in awhile.
The dish looks delicious–however, I can’t imagine eating anything other than popcorn by myself. Maybe when Cole is gone for two weeks in May (school trip) I will tire of popcorn and give it a try!
♥
Yes, this is absolutely perfect to enjoy in the silence of a house that contains too much noise! I am a little fearful of the anchovies, and for the record, you are a bad-ass for making anything for just you. My guilty pleasure would have been sushi and Thai curry. ‘Cause I’m a whore like that…
Thanks for your sweet emails, comment to comment…I needed the virtual hug!
A quiet home and pasta…. I would have kept revisiting the frig…:) I love pasta and it definitely is a feel good kind of food :-)
I am never, ever home alone. And if I were I have no idea what I would eat.
From one noodle slut to another! My home alone meal is pasta with butter, garlic, salt, pepper, and parmesan or romano cheese (generously sprinkled, ok globbed!) on it.
I had no idea what “puttanesca” meant.
Thanks for sharing your single food. I’ll share mine with you because it’s too good to believe:
Pasta (preferably linguine) sauteed in butter and feta cheese, with a little parmesan on top. I learned to cook for 5 people, and can’t seem to break the habit. There are always leftovers. Sometimes not for long. :(
All that spice! you are such a noodle hussy! Actually it your single girl meals sound a lot like some of my day off lunches. If it can be spread on bread or eaten off of a paper towel while watching TV it is a meal to me. Liverwurst, tortilla rollup and a beer is great company for a day of X-files reruns and napping :-)
Bryan,
You’re an X-phile, too?
Your single girl meals put me to shame. When left to my own devices, I open a can of tuna (light, in olive oil) and eat right from the can.
So…can I join your noodle brothel? I make a mean aglio e olio and a serious cacio e pepe as well as a delicious tomato sauce…
Elizabeth,
You are so invited to be in the Noodle Brothel! ha!
That dish looks fabulous! Needless to say, ‘noodle slut’ is the newest addition to my vocab…and also, I’m having a pasta dish for supper for sure.
OK – I saw noodle slut and came a’runnin’….. I am in awe, btw. Your weird, eat on the sly alone food is so much better than mine. I just concoct bizarre sandwiches with white bean hummus, finish it off with some sort of Greek yogurt with fruit mixed in chaser and call it a day. Pasta Puttanesca!!! In awe :-). Wondering what else went on while you had such industrious alone time….. you creative creature you.
You are so good. Will you come to my house for a girls’ dinner night? I love pasta too but I’ve never made it just for myself. These days I don’t even know what I would do if I were home alone at dinner time. In my 20’s my single girl meal was a scoop of vanilla ice cream and Hersey’s syrup between two Eggo waffles. The trick is to eat it fast before the hot waffles melt the ice cream.
My alone food: Cereal and milk. This pasta looks divine Kitch (hold off on the anchovies for me). And as a vegetarian I’ve had lots of pasta….
MMMM……That all sounds yummy. Trying to stay away from pasta, so’s I can reduce my waistline, but once in awhile is good. I made your “Kofta” for dinner tonight. It was Fantastic. Went to grocery today and filled the spice cabinet with some new and wonderful delights.
Papa Guy,
Glad your kofta turned out! And you’re right, once in a while, a little pasta is a necessity.
I love it, your lazy girl food matches mine! However I am super lazy and have steamed rice with a tin of sardines and stick a few broccoli flowers in with the rice for the last 5min of steaming (I also HATE washing up). I have also been known to eat blue cheese, olives and jalapenos on toast. I love your choice in pasta……it’s always been a favourite :)
How could I not read a post by this tittle?
And I am so impressed you made a meal for yourself when you were alone and lazy. I wouldn’t have.
i’ve recently become obsessed with oh-so-salty capers (and, for the record, pimento cheese on anything), so this is a very appealing eat-alone meal for me. i’d get sloppy, i won’t lie. :)
Puttanesca is my favorite pasta of all times… I make it so often I think of it as my signature dish, I guess.
Suddenly tonights salmonburgers do not seem appetizing anymore…
Salmonburgers? Do tell!
I LOVE puttanesca, but alas, My Guy’s not a fan of olives, anchovies and capers – ingredients I adore in this dish. Now that mom is here, I think it’s time for slutty noodle night again and he can have the salad.
I hear you about the weird stuff we eat when alone. I crave raisin bread with LOTS of butter or just a bigass bowl of cereal when not having to feed the masses. Even for dinner. What can I say? I like not worrying about the food pyramid when I’m indulging alone because god knows I think about that enough when my family’s around.
OMG, these noodles have my name written all over them. And can I just say…at least you MAKE yourself dinner when you’re alone. I just either hit the drive-through or the sauce, whatever’s easier at the moment…
When my sister and I were in high school we saw Martha (pre-prison) make this on her show and explain the genesis of its name. We then prided ourselves on calling it “hooker stew” from then on. We are now 31 and 33 and the name has stuck! (Maturity is highly overrated…)
Gale,
“Hooker stew” is awesome!! Screw maturity.
You had me at “Noodle Slut.”
;)
Really? REALLY? Those are your single girl meals? Mine is Lucky Charms.
Sometimes I long for nights when my husband might be out with friends and I am on my own for dinner so that I can make this things that I love and he loathes, like things with mushrooms, squash, or sweet potato. Alas, he rarely ever is gone at dinnertime. But next month he is spending a weekend at the lake with the boys… so I will go to town then! Great post!
So your “I’m-alone-go-to” meals seriously ring a bell–2 of mine with striking similarities to yours are:
1. rice slathered in butter with a little seasoned salt
2. rice with some Ragu tomato sauce, blue cheese, and 2 fried eggs on top
I love the rare occasion of eating alone and being able to indulge in rice, rice, and more rice.
Eating alone at home?! Sweet heaven. Never happens at my place. I have to go out for that. But I’ll be honest, if I am alone I never cook for myself. Unless there is feta in the house, and noodles. And olive oil. Less the olives. No olives thank you.
That puttanesca sounds absolutely full of flavor –what with anchovies, white wine and garlic MMMMMMM:)
I’m still laughing at your “lazy slob single girl” meals. What? I eat a bowl of cereal. And the fact that you made that pasta when you were at home, alone? I’m amazed. Looks awesome.
Julie and other cereal eaters,
Why is it that cereal seems more comforting at night?
Clever title and post. I’m a p*ta for some Puttanesca. The combination of capers, olives, chili flakes and anchovy flavor, I find irresistible! And now I’m kinda wishing I could have a single night in to myself. I don’t remember putting wine in my recipe but maybe because I’m too busy imbibing it.
You know I love ya, my kindred spirit noodle slut ;) And the pasta putanesca?? A mighty plus for quite sometime at Chez McVay! Never thought of making it during alone time… Guess I figured I’d eat the whole damn thing too!
You had me at Noodle Slut and kept me the whole way through. I wish I had the passion for food that you do. I am always impressed by your memory, your food and your fantastic style over here. I’m totally up for some whore pasta. Just invite me over. I will be there.
Pasta puttanesca is one of my addictions as well. Who could go wrong with pasta and olives? They’re a girl’s best friends.
As for being an insatiable pasta trollop, I count myself as one of the diseased. A friend announced recently, “Dana, do you eat anything other than spaghetti? Whenever I see you eat you’re eating spaghetti, or making spaghetti.” I just like it a lot :P
You cook for yourself when you’re home alone? *BOW*
I eat chocolate. Or ramen noodles straight from the pot over the kitchen sink. I do that even when I am not alone. LOL
I admire this. I truly do. When I’m alone, it’s Triscuits and goat cheese. Every time.
I hate doing dishes that much. Thank God I share my home or it would be ugly.
I assume it would be ironic to substitute angelhair for this recipe … ;)
Prepackaging the portions before starting on your meal: very wise. I have totally done shameless things over the kitchen sink when not blessed with such forethought.
Good for you that you made yourself something YOU wanted!! Bravo!!
I love this sort of pasta – so delicious and your photo looks ace. I really enjoyed the italian facts too -wicked!!! I’m off to north italy in 3 weeks – exciting times will report back! xxx
Can you believe I have never purchased anchovies? But I will be doing it soon so I can try this. M-m-m-m.
I can get by with anchovie paste – you are right, it just melts into the dish with a saltiness that is so good – however, whole anchovies, the one my husband likes to put on pizza? Hairy, slimey – just gross. But I put them on his pizza because I love him!
What is the meaning of this phrase…”home alone at dinnertime?” I can almost wrap my brain around it…and it sounds delicious. Honestly, I probably would’ve went the first route (olives, cheese, triscuits)…and a bottle of wine, but I like that you let your noodle-whore loose ;) I think all of those explanations have merit, too. Anyhoo…yum!
I’m off pasta right now (ugh) but will be henceforth referring to my husband as “noodle slut.”
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