Crab and Avocado Duet

Once, a college girl was in love. Or lust. Or something, but she certainly knew that this boy, this boy who sat in front of her in Fiction 101, this boy with the black hair and the clear blue eyes? This boy was going to change her life.

That is, if he’d ever notice her.

She always sat behind him, but at an angle, so she could study his broad shoulders, his lush eyelashes, the tiny clench of the jaw when he concentrated. She peered out from beneath her behemoth 80’s bangs, stealing glimpses, feeling fizzy and full and hollow all at the same time.

She wore her best Guess? jeans to lectures, did the required reading twice before class so so she’d sound intelligent if called upon. She nearly lip-glossed herself to death.

And then one day, one amazingly fine day, he noticed her. Not only did he notice her, he asked her to a party. A Fraternity party. The kind of party she never got asked to.

The Fraternity house smelled like sweat and Budweiser and stale marijuana, and what passed for a bathroom in that place was criminal.

But the boy didn’t get too drunk and he made decent conversation and he said he liked her blue sweater. He didn’t seem to notice the slight tremor of her hand as she held her beer cup or that she struggled for words.

He walked her back to her dorm at the end of the night, and just when she was sure he’d never kiss her, he leaned in slowly…

And nearly ate her tongue.

If the boy ever found himself unemployed, she thought, he could hire out that tongue as a Roto-Rooter. She almost choked on that enthusiastic, crack-the-whip monstrosity.

And BAM! The dream was over. So much promise…

That’s kind of how I felt when I made this Crab and Avocado Duet from Ellie Krieger’s cookbook So Easy.

The ingredients were good lookin’. The presentation was innovative. The finished dish, I was sure, was going to have that wow factor. But in the end? Disappointing.

It really didn’t have much flavor, to be honest. And I used good crabmeat, Scout’s Honor! I was flummoxed. What’s not to like about crab and avocado?

In the end, I separated the crabmeat from the avocado, added some capers and a squeeze of mayonnaise, a dab more dijon, a few cracks of salt and pepper, and put the avocado, the “doctored-up” crab mixture and a few slices of tomato on a soft roll. Then I sweetened the deal with a few strips of crisp bacon. Crab club sandwich! A big improvement, I thought, and hubs had to agree. We happily munched Plan B. and decided that there’s more to life than good lookin’.

Crab and Avocado Duet
from Ellie Krieger’s So Easy
serves 4

1 ripe avocado
3 tablespoons fresh lemon juice
1/4 teaspoon salt, plus more to taste
1 teaspoon Dijon mustard
pinch of ground pepper
1/2 pound lump crabmeat
2 tablespoons chopped chives or parsley

whole grain baguette, to serve

Pit and peel the avocado and cut it into 1/2-inch chunks. In a small bowl, toss the avocado chunks gently with 1 tablespoon of the lemon juice and season with salt to taste.

In a medium bowl, whisk together the remaining 2 tablespoons of lemon juice, the Dijon mustard, pepper and 1/4 teaspoon salt. Add the crabmeat and toss.

For a decorative presentation, stand an empty 15-ounce can (with both the top and bottom removed) on a serving plate. Scoop a quarter of the avocado into the can, being careful to avoid any sharp edge on the rim. Place a quarter of the crabmeat on top and press down gently into the can. Gently pull the can off the avocado and crab mixture. Garnish with chopped chives or parsley.